Self Matters: Synchronicities and Serendipities—How to Find Them

My life is filled with synchronicities and serendipities, and so is yours. I am in constant awe about the unplanned, unrequested joys I experience. Some people call it “chance” or “luck” or “coincidence.” Whatever name you give this phenomenon, honor the feelings that go with your culminating event.

So, what are synchronicities and serendipities? Synchronicities are situations that pop up unexpected, but hoped for, like a great parking space. There is an element of intention. We can neither create them nor predict them. We may plan, but in the end, the finish is out of our control, and might be more wonderful than we imagined possible. Serendipities are always “happy accidents.” that require nothing more than our willingness to be open to receive them. So, synchronicities lead to serendipities. What fun!

Everything in our lives has an origination point. What if you had taken the bus to work? You would not have seen that $100 bill on the sidewalk that other people had not noticed. How do explain your relief at staying home after the news highlighted a 50-vehicle pile-up on the main highway into town due to ice? What if you had not seen the man sitting on the roof of his home with a gasoline can? (This really happened to me.) You could not have called 911 for help.

While synchronicities can be a lot of fun and bring many happy moments, they may also bring sad or bittersweet outcomes. What if you looked at your vehicle’s gas gauge and decided you could no longer put off the task? And, what if, just as you pulled up to the pump, the warning light came on and the warning signal beeped? You could feel relieved. But what if you noticed your left rear tire was low on air and the convenience store did not have an air pump? However, the tire did not blow up on the interstate. You could again feel relieved. This is an example of two events that could have gone terribly wrong, but did not.

For several years I wanted more bookcases for my office. I checked online and a store that sells furniture cast off from corporate offices. No, nothing there either. In August, I joined a group and at the first meeting I attended, one woman shared that an earlier group left a bookcase and curio cabinet. She placed “FREE” signs on both items, but no one took them. So, she asked the group for permission to donate them. I said, “I will take them.” A few days later she and her husband delivered them to my apartment. Both are large and the curio has smoked glass shelves and a light. Had I missed that meeting, the pieces would have been gone.

My neighbor in the apartment above mine took the bookcase from my building’s community room because there was not enough space for it and no one else wanted it. She then decided she did not want it, so she asked me if I needed a bookcase. Yes! These occurrences happened two weeks apart.

My therapist started working at the counseling center six months before I called to make an appointment. Had either his timing or mine varied, we may be looking at a very different outcome.

These kinds of events happens quite often in my life.

Because I am a person who wants to know how things work, I enjoy tracing my way back to the origin of events.

There are several ways to cultivate synchronicity, although you cannot create it directly.

Always have your journal or a notebook handy—even beside your bed—so you can record synchronicities while they are fresh in your mind. If you cannot write a full entry jot down a few key words and a catch phrase such as, “Great help!” When you arrive in a space where you can write, follow the guidelines below. You do not need to let others know you admire, appreciate, or feel surprised.

I have a separate journal for writing synchronicities, serendipities, epiphanies, and insights. Assorted colors of ink brighten my journal and create for me a sense of joy. Writing those pages makes me smile, or even laugh. Gratitude is organic as I write my astonishment at the wonderful “gifts” that arrive in my life daily—sometimes several times a day.

A Useful Ritual

This is much different from writing a gratitude list at the end of the day. By recognizing the happy accidents in your life, you can attract more of them. You will be in a constant state of awe, and your favorite word will be, “Wow.” And awe leads to profound gratitude. Noticing will become a way of life for you.

1. Position yourself where you will be comfortable. Relax, take a few deep breaths (diaphragmatic breathing is excellent, if you are familiar). Imagine you are someplace safe and beautiful. Now, clasp your hands at the center of your chest. Slowly unclasp your hands and open your arms so you feel your chest expanding. Breathe in the cool warmth of air going into and out of your nostrils. Words of affirmation or mantras may be useful. For me, they work as distractions as I am more likely to get into saying what I want or need instead of creating a space for “receiving” within me. The whole premise of synchronicities is you never saw the experience coming. It is always a surprise. If I speak, I may say something like, “Tell me what I need to know.” I then release the thought and go about my day. Ninety percent of the time, synchronicities are not the result of a request.
   
   
2. Become aware. Look around you wherever you are and gaze lightly at your surroundings. Asking “How” is your first step. How did you get there? Why not some other method of arrival? Where did you buy your shoes? Were they the last pair in your size and the color you wanted?
   
   
3. Next comes “What if…” you had done an alternative? What might you have missed or avoided? What is this experience in my life related to?

Journal about your findings rather than just listing them. What do they mean to you? What feelings and emotions come up? Write as much or as little as you wish, while ensuring your entry will still delight you when you read it later.

May your life be infused with innumerable happy accidents. Want to share the synchronicities you are experiencing? I invite you to leave your comments below.

Be well. Be safe. Be at peace. Happy writing.

Author bio:  Billie Wade is a writer living in central Iowa. She is the creator and founder of Journaling to Heal, a program she designed to help people as they travel their journey of healing from emotional stress and trauma. Her background, education, and experience enhance her innate compassion and reverence for other human beings.

She shares her strength and hope on www.journalingtoheal.com.