Money has a significant impact on our lives, and it can so often be a source of stress. This is particularly true in relationships, where financial strain could result in tension with your partner. In fact, a survey found that 29% of couples found money to be the cause of the majority of their arguments.
It can be a difficult topic to broach, however, by working together, you and your spouse can heal your relationship with money and create a more stable financial future. In this article, we explore a few of the ways that couples can overcome financial challenges and build a stronger foundation.
In order to get started on your financial healing journey, you’ll need to establish a shared vision of what you both want to work towards. This could include saving for a house deposit, paying off debt or replacing an item in your home. Whatever it is, take the time to discuss and identify goals that are most important to each of you. Keep in mind that your priorities may evolve as you grow together as a couple, and these initial targets aren’t necessarily set in stone. However, having an idea of what you want to put your money towards is important in giving you direction when it comes to financial planning.
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Once you’ve decided on the vision you want to work towards, it’s time to set some short and long-term goals that can help you to get there. You’ll then need to analyse your spending and saving habits to fit with these goals, deciding on what you feel would best represent your shared priorities. It’s important to be willing to make compromises where necessary, as in the end, you’re working towards the same solid financial future.
With a shared vision in place, it can be helpful to set up a joint bank account if you haven’t already done so. However, remember that activity on a joint account will impact both of your credit files, so make sure you use it responsibly to keep your finances in a healthy spot now and later in life. The right credit card can be a useful tool for managing expenses, but it's important to ensure that you're both on the same page when it comes to spending.
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Arguments are often caused by simple miscommunications or assumptions and can be partially mitigated by promoting open and honest communication in a relationship. As a result, it’s essential to have open discussions about your financial goals, values and concerns. By actively listening to each other’s perspectives on your finances, you’ll have a clearer idea of what to expect going forward.
It’s also important to check in regularly with your partner to review your finances. A simple purchase here and there can quickly cause a diversion from your financial goals, so implementing regular reviews can help to get you back on track. This could include discussing your budgeting, tracking expenses and setting additional goals where needed to ensure that both parties are still on the same wavelength. Again, setting up a joint account is an effective way to more easily track your spending and highlight areas where you could potentially cut back.
Unfortunately, it isn’t just a case of looking to the future when it comes to money management in a relationship. For many couples, past financial issues can continue to impact their habits and attitudes in the present. It’s crucial for both parties to be open and honest about any lingering financial conflicts or traumas, as this can help to build an understanding of the reasons behind any issues. This could mean talking it through together, or it may be beneficial to seek out the help of a financial therapist who can guide you through the healing process.
During this process, it’s important to be as understanding and forgiving as possible. Understand that everyone makes mistakes, and it’s up to you to work past these issues together. It’s always better to know about previous financial struggles in advance, as this way you can have a plan in place to handle any issues with compassion.
Healing your relationship with money is not an overnight process. But with dedication and understanding, it’s possible to reach your goals. It’s important to take this process seriously and not rush into anything, as trying to change deep-seated habits can be a tricky process.
By taking it one step at a time, you and your spouse can work towards building a solid foundation for your financial future. After all, a strong shared financial vision can lead to a more fulfilling and happy relationship in the long term. Plus, you may even find some of the skills you develop along the way – like learning to broach difficult topics – stand you in good stead in other aspects of your relationship too.
Author Bio:
Lily Pierre is a seasoned financial writer who aims to provide practical advice for couples to navigate the complex world of joint finances. As a freelancer, she writes for companies like Upgraded Points to raise awareness about financial security. When she’s not writing about money matters, you can find her exploring new destinations around the world.