"I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year." Charles Dickens
It's easy to get trapped in a cycle of obligations during the holiday season. Shopping, hosting and attending parties and religious gatherings, decorating, traveling, and other activities can cause you to forget the true meaning of Christmas, and leave you stressed and feeling guilty long after the festivities end.
My favorite childhood Christmas memories are having my very own shoebox filled with fruits, nuts, and candy that I could eat whenever I wanted, and watching my mother turn our kitchen into a bustling little bakery. There was something magical about the way she took simple ingredients - flour, sugar, eggs, and milk, added some spices, and created delectable desserts that satisfied many a "sweet tooth."
Family and friends looked forward to her boiled custard, smooth chocolate fudge candy, and melt-in-your-mouth pineapple and coconut cakes. She started baking several days early to ensure she had enough homemade gifts to spread around. And the more she baked, the happier I was; it meant more spoons to lick and bowls to scrape.
But that was decades ago when the Spirit of Christmas meant creating lasting memories that didn’t require excess spending. Commercialization and consumerism now overshadow the true meaning of Christmas, marking the festive landscape with relentless advertising and social media comparisons that would have us believe that the more we spend, the merrier we will be.
Much of our spending is on children, but I wonder if they understand why they receive gifts at Christmastime. How many of them know the story of the Magi bringing gifts to the newborn king we call Jesus, and the intended message behind the story: the message of Divine gifts we each possess - gifts that we can't buy in the store?
In the 1990s, "What Would Jesus Do?" (WWJD) became a popular phrase in Christian circles and beyond as a guiding principle for moral decision-making. While thinking about the Christmas narrative, I asked myself, "Today, WWJD about the commercialized obligations tied to his birth?" And here's the answer I came up with: My only obligation is to appreciate the Divine gifts of love, joy, creativity, talent, compassion, intuition, wisdom, courage, and generosity, and use them not only at Christmas, but throughout the year.
I'm grateful for my mother's example of avoiding Christmas obligations that she didn’t enjoy or could not afford. Making a list and expecting Santa to fill it for ten children was not how Christmas unfolded in our home. Mama never entertained the idea, and we kids didn't either. She told us right up front that she didn't have that kind of money, so we learned to appreciate our shoebox, a surprise toy or two, and an abundance of hearty home-cooked food.
When you learn better, you do better. I've learned that the heart is the keeper of my Divine gifts, and it knows the importance of not getting sidetracked by frivolous obligations that cause me to miss the magic of Christmas and neglect my Self-Care practices.
So here are a few things I'll be doing this holiday season:
- I will be teaching my great-nieces to crochet. They've asked, and now is the perfect time to bond and share with them the gift of creativity, a gift that could last a lifetime.
- I will enjoy working on Christmas-themed jigsaw puzzles with my son, daughter, and anyone who stops in for a holiday visit.
- I will prepare dishes I enjoy making, buy those I don't like to make, and generously share them with family and friends.
- I won't be buying gifts just for the sake of giving; it’s such a waste of money and time. The novelty of opening store-bought gifts fades quickly, and if the gift doesn't resonate with the recipient, it gets recycled or left untouched. And with kids, they usually have one toy they enjoy; the others wind up in the closet, under the bed, or in the trash.
- I won't attend gatherings just because someone else thinks I should.
- I will send Christmas blessings to family and friends I can't be with in person and make every effort to speak to as many as possible on the phone.
If you celebrate Christmas, you believe in the Christmas story. Therefore, I hope you allow the magical gifts of the Divine to guide you throughout this holiday season and beyond. Not sure what they are? Follow your heart. The heart will never turn on you or cause you to engage in obligations that could haunt you long after the season ends.
May your Christmas holidays be filled with wonder!
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Myrtle Russell is here to help with her "Unwrapping the Gifts of Gratitude Journaling” Workshop or one-on-one coaching. Contact her at smallchange@myrtlerussell.com. Catch up on her Self-care blogs at www.myrtlerussell.com/blog.
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