There was the time you absolutely knew you would marry your high school sweetheart and live happily ever after... until you moved away for college and ended up falling for someone else. Or the time you were sure you wanted to be the CEO of a Fortune 500 company... until you were miserable working in the corporate world and decided you would much prefer running a nonprofit.
Life doesn’t always work out the way you planned it, which can be frustrating or downright devastating, but sometimes a curveball from the universe can turn out to be a blessing in disguise. In this reflective writing exercise, think back on the different times in your life when your best-laid plans went off course. Pick one instance where you are sure the change in your original plan was actually for the best.
1. Tell your journal about Plan A. Put it into context and describe how old you were, where you were living and other important details of your life at the time. What were you initially trying to accomplish? Why was this important to you? What steps were you taking to achieve your goal? For example:
I was 25 and set on moving from Chicago to go to graduate school in New York City so I could be closer to my boyfriend who was in law school there. I was head over heels in love and tired of having a long-distance relationship, so I was applying to every program remotely related to what I wanted to study.
2. What went wrong with Plan A? Describe what happened to derail your intentions. For example:
My boyfriend, who I was so crazy about, didn’t feel the same way. He broke up with me for another girl as I was waiting to hear back from grad school programs.
3. Now is the tough part of the reflective writing process: write about how you felt at the moment you realized you weren’t getting what you wanted. What were the first thoughts to cross your mind? How did you react at first? Did you journal at all? For example:
I was absolutely devastated. I went through a major break-up meltdown and cried for weeks. I couldn’t believe that I had been so blind about this person I loved and I felt really hurt and betrayed and angry. I did write in my journal, but I could only do short periods at a time at first.
4. At what point did you realize that this wrench in your plans was actually a blessing in disguise? What was your Plan B? Why was it better than Plan A in the long run? What were the long-term repercussions? For example:
It took me a full year or more to come to this realization. I delayed going to grad school for a year because I no longer wanted to move to NYC, but it gave me time to think about what I really wanted to do with my life. I ended up getting into a program in Austin, a city I never would have thought to live before, and having an amazing experience there. I found my niche in my studies, made incredible friends and got a great job in Austin when I graduated. I never would have ended up here had it not been for that awful break-up pushing me to try something new.
What did you journal about for this reflective writing exercise? Share your experiences in the comment section.
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